P is for petty & D is for damn.

Not back with a decluttering update just yet. My living room is chock full of all the stuff I’m getting rid of at the yard sale this Friday.

I am, however, back with a whole bunch of petty. Shit, man. Seriously, if I acted on impulse I’d have no friends right now. The more time goes by this summer, the more I realize how much of a curmudgeon I am. I think there’s about a handful of people I can tolerate on my feed right now and the rest just cause me to roll my eyes like a surly teenager. I’m sure I’m just as obnoxious on there as most people I’m friends with, but fuck.

I went to watch “Girl’s Trip” with Mona on Monday. Great movie, you should watch it; it’s hilarious & the soundtrack alone is worth it. I felt a little pang of sadness?hurt?regret? because the girls I am the closest with don’t live in Brownsville and the others just fell off the face of the earth. I miss my friends, damnit.

I walk a constant line veering between “be yourself, say what you mean, screw whoever doesn’t like it” and “try to be nice to everyone, give people the benefit of the doubt, be compassionate.” But it’s hard, y’all. There’s only so much idiocy you can take, so much two-facedness you can tolerate, and so much crap you can put up with. It’s tough. Is there middle ground between my two options? Well sure, but then I feel like I’m being fake and I have a problem with that too, but I guess it’s better than blurting out whatever comes to mind when I think someone is being a bitch or an asshole, no? Still haven’t perfected my poker face, so I guess my smirks, eye rolls, and other facial expressions will keep outing what I’m really thinking. And I wonder why I don’t have close friends…lol. But seriously.

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